With Fort Sumter  as a backdrop, South Carolina Governor Henry McMaster signed legislature today that will start extreme vetting of those who want to immigrate to South Carolina.

The Lucky Puppy has tried to get a copy of “The South Carolina Protection Act”.  While we have not seen the entire document, reliable sources inside the State House have leaked portions of the SCPA.

SECTION 17-1 Those persons who are intent to cross the border of South Carolina shall present a valid passport issued by the State of South Carolina.

SECTION 17-2 Those persons who are intent to cross the border of South Carolina and do not posses a valid passport issued by the State of South Carolina shall present a valid passport issued by their Home Nation or State.

SECTION 17-3 Those persons who are intent to cross the border of South Carolina and claim to be immigrants from the States of California, Washington, Oregon, Nevada and Colorado shall be denied entry.  After passing a criminal background check and swearing allegiance to the State of South Carolina shall be allowed to reside within the borders of South Carolina for a probationary period of not less than six months.

SECTION 19-1 The Oath of Allegiance to the Great State of South Carolina will include.

19-2 “I shall abide to the laws, regulations and social norms of the State of South Carolina”.

19-3 “I swear allegiance to the Carolina Panthers NFL football team without mental  reservations or purposes of evasion.”

10-4 “Supper is a meal.  Y’all is a word.  Gamecocks is one word.”

10-5 “You promise that your children will be Clemson University Fighting Tigers.”

10-6 “The only reason to miss Church is NASCAR.”

10-7 “English is the only language of the Great State of South Carolina.  When spoken it must be with a twang.”

10-8 “Those person born North of the Mason/Dixon Line will forever be referred to as YANKEES. Those persons who are granted the privilege of living in South Carolina shall forever be referred to as DAMN YANKEES. Bless their hearts.”

10-9 “Barbecue is mustard-based.”

10-10 “I’m Big on the Pig”

10-11″There are four seasons: winter, spring, summer and college football.”

10-12 “There’s nothing finer than to be in Carolina.”

SECTION 21-1 North Carolina has always been a State.  South Carolina considers North Carolina  a retarded younger brother.  Residents of North Carolina can only enter the State of South Carolina on Thanksgiving.  They must leave the State after Supper.”

SECTION 25-1 The period of history from 1860 to 1865 shall be referred to as The War of Northern Aggression.

SECTION 30-1 A wall will be built on the borders of North Carolina and Georgia.  The Yankees are going to pay for it.