A Highlight of an Air Force Career

I can neither confirm nor deny that this incident happened.

A nolone zone may contain a cryptographic component, weapon system hardware under test, a nuclear weapon or active nuclear weapon controls. In the United States Air Force (USAF) policy concerning critical weapons, a nolone zone is an area in which the presence of a single individual is prohibited.

AFI91-104 23 APRIL 2013
Read the Regulation here.

3.4.2. Take immediate, positive steps to prevent or stop an incorrect procedure or unauthorized act.

In the United States Air Force there is a Nuclear Authentication NCO. They are in charge of the permission to launch a nuclear strike. Pilots are cycled in and out for training. the NCO position is permanent for continuity.

WAR STORY

On Thursday, we* were standing Nuclear Alert as a training exercise. Even though it was training, we were uploaded with the real weapons and were the ninth largest nuclear power in the world.

* pronouns are used for story telling and do not indicate any real person, living or dead.

I got a radio call from one of my security guards saying he had a problem. On arriving, I found a LtCol Pilot who come out to see “his” aircraft and “his” weapon. I informed him that it was “my” aircraft and “my” weapon. I offered him a ride back to ops and gave him 20 minutes to find his “two-man”.

Twenty minutes later, the guard called me again. The Colonel was back. I was not polite this time. I told him he had 20 minutes to shag his ass back to ops and find his two-man. If I found his crew chief watching movies in the lounge, I would handcuff the two of them together. I jangled cuffs in his face. The pilot who was my two-man said, “He’ll do it, sir. I’ve seen him do it.” The Colonel stomps off.

I was enjoying my MRE lunch of a Ham Slice when I got a third call. Fuck. Now I’m pissed. The conversation with the Colonel was heated.

He accused me of doing sexual things to my Mother.

I accused him of doing sexual things with small farm animals and kitchen appliances.

I’d have enough. I took an immediate, positive step to prevent or stop an incorrect procedure or unauthorized act.

I drew my pistol. At this point the guard turned off his radio and went behind the crew chief shack for a smoke break. My Lt pissed his pants. In the de-brief he said he didn’t know if he was supposed to shoot me or help me shoot the Colonel.

As per regulations, he supposed to help me shoot the Colonel

.I gave him to the count of three to leave the No Lone Zone. I counted down. At “one” I took the safety off and said,

“This is you last and final warning to un-ass the NO..LONE..ZONE…sir.

On Monday morning he was spot demoted to Major and sent back to the States. I was awarded a Meritorious Service Medal and acquired a reputation not to be fucked with.

B-36 Drops Nuke on Albuquerque

B-36 Peacekeeper

May 22, 1957- A B-36 aircraft (52-2816) of the 334th Bombardment Squadron, 95th Bombardment Wing, was transporting a Mark 17 ten-megaton hydrogen bomb from Biggs AFB, Texas to Kirkland AFB, New Mexico. As the aircraft was on approach to Kirkland and over Albuquerque, New Mexico, the thermonuclear device, weighing 42,000 pounds, dropped from the bomber just 4 miles south of Albuquerque.

Mark 17
Mark 17 Hydrogen bomb.

Accounts of what caused the incident vary, but one version suggests that a crewmember in the bomb bay was jolted by sudden turbulence. He grabbed hold of the manual bomb release lever to steady himself, causing the weapon to crash through the closed bomb bay doors and plummet to earth.

Richard ″Dick″ Meyer, 62, a retired lieutenant colonel, told the El Paso (Texas) Times that a crewman between the wings and the tail of the aircraft saw what had happened.

″Simultaneously, he called, ‘Bombs away,’ and the plane lurched upward about 1,000 feet when it lost so much weight at once,″ Meyer said.

″And someone yelled, ‘Oh, SHIT.’ It might have been me,″ Meyer said.

The weapon plummeted 1700 feet to earth and exploded. The physics package which made the bomb nuclear was not installed for obvious safety reasons. However, the conventional explosives used to support the detonation of the package did explode. A crater 25 feet in diameter was formed and a cow was killed. Radioactive material remaining in the weapon showered down for a mile around the explosion. The Air Force reimbursed the farmer for his cow and the city of Albuquerque for the land and roads destroyed when the Air Force removed the contaminated soil.

The B-36