How Do I Talk to a Crew Chief?

There are many times when it is necessary to actually talk to a Dedicated Crew Chief. You might be a pilot preparing to fly and want to know if the jet you’re climbing into is safe. You might be a new flight chief who never had the privilege of being a DCC and are trying to figure out how to make these people work. You might be MARRIED to a crew chief and trying to convince them beer and pistachios aren’t the only food that needs to be in the house.

At best in any situation is’t difficult to determine exactly what the crew chief is saying. To help you with this we’ve provided a short list of translations of commonly used phrases.

And when the fuck do you expect me to do this?
MEANS: Perhaps I can work late.

No fucking way.
MEANS: I’m certain that isn’t feasible.

You’ve got to be shitting me!
MEANS:Really?

Tell someone who gives a shit.
MEANS: Perhaps you should check with…

It’s not my fucking problem.
MEANS: I wasn’t involved in the project.

What the fuck?
MEANS: That’s interesting.

This shit won’t work.
MEANS: I’m not sure this can be implemented.

Why the hell didn’t you tell me sooner?
MEANS: I’ll try to schedule that.

He’s got his head up his ass.
MEANS: He’s not familiar with the issues.

Eat shit and die.
MEANS: Excuse me?

Kiss my ass.
MEANS: So you weren’t happy with it?

Fuck it, I’m on salary.
MEANS: TRY SAYING: I’m a bit overloaded at the moment.

Shove it up your ass.
MEANS: I don’t think you understand.

This job sucks.
MEANS: I love a challenge.

Who the hell died and made you boss?
MEANS: You want me to take care of that?

Blow me.
MEANS: I see.

He’s a prick.
MEANS: He’s somewhat insensitive.

She’s a ball-busting bitch.
MEANS: She’s an aggressive go-getter.

You don’t know what the fuck you’re doing.
MEANS: I think you could use more training.

Screw You.
MEANS: I enjoy working with you.

Who fucked this up?
MEANS: This isn’t working right.