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Lexophiles

Got  this is my email, had to share.

“Lexophile” is a word used to describe those that love using words in rather unique ways, such as “you can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish”, or “to write with a broken pencil is pointless.” A competition to see who can come up with the best one is held every year. This year’s winning submission is posted at the very end.

. When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.

. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.

. The batteries were given out free of charge.

. A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.

. A will is a dead giveaway.

. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

. When you’ve seen one shopping Center you’ve seen a mall.

. Police were called to a day care Center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

. Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.

. A bicycle can’t stand alone; it is two tired.

. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.

. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

. When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she’d dye.

. Acupuncture is a jab well done. That’s the point of it.

And the cream of the wretched crop:

. Those who get too big for their pants will be exposed in the end.

[ed note:Thanks Joy]

MORE STUFF ABOUT WORDS HERE


{ 1 comment… add one }
  • laconic June 14, 2014, 18:04

    Here are some good ones:

    All the toilets in New York ‘s police stations have been stolen. Police have nothing to go on.
    Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.
    I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
    I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
    I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.
    I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.
    Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
    When chemists die, they barium.
    When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

    Source: http://wordsbybob.wordpress.com/2011/02/18/lexiphile-or-lexophile/

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